Did I do something wrong? I hit a dozen "not implemented yet" every minute. Nothing works, saved the computer game and university class in the main building. Why are the reviewers underneath sounded like they were enjoying something?
Not much content, but the writing is pretty good
What's there is fine so far. Add some substance before you stretch out and go further in content. Make sure you flesh everything out as you don't want just a bunch of dead end links. Keep going because your idea is solid.
It is only just started as a game.
One thing that does not make sence is
You sleep like a baby without any dream
You dont sleep very well. The constant thought of being magically transformed into the girl next morning makes you really uncomfortable and horny, but you resist from jerking off and force yourself to sleep
Is the game done when you get the letter?
The one "download" link should be a Play Now button. Just a head's up.
It gonna be a very very beatiful story. Pretty straightforward but in pleasant way. Everything is so cute - thoughts, images, events and story line. Everybody will love this one piece of art!
What I like about this is the story, along with the pictures/gifs. As a secret crossdresser myself, I found the story to be very relatable, especially with the way the thoughts of the player are described. In fact, this is probably the only game on this site so far that I have read word for word.
Now, what I don't like about this is that it is on a game site, and it is definitely not a game at all. The story is great, but that's all it is, a story. Also there are parts where the timeline of the story jumps ahead without warning and leaves the reader confused. For example, at the part where the player character is sucking on the dildo and finishes and cums in his panties, and on the next page it seems like he was caught sucking a dildo up until the sentence "If she had caught me blowing his boy or with cum on my face, I had no explanation for that." How did the character go from being caught right after sucking a dildo to almost being caught sucking an actual cock?
There are also a few parts where the grammer is not so great, but it is still bearable (unlike some games on this site).
Another thing that I dislike is that the last update was so long ago. I am really looking forward to another update to this game.
I am of a split opinion on this one.
On one hand, after going through the game I thought that I was just reading a story with one single interactive choice to make. The writing was okay, but the color coding of the text when they were written in solid paragraphs started to get a bit much and I found myself becoming disinterested in the story. It actually reached the point where I honestly hit the Eight Deadly Words of story telling: "I don't care what happens to these people."
There were just too few points of interaction.
Now on the other hand, the writing about the sexual exploits were alright and the psychological dilemma that went with it as the main character fell more into their personal fantasies and letting their sexual desires become a full-blown addiction was intriguing to read when I could fight past the color-coded text and understand the situation as I, the player/reader, am expected to (as I am to believe?). The images that have been included to go with those scenes do fit the story and draw the reader in. But they do overshadow it when combined with the previous comment that there were just too few points of interaction and choice, so the reader instead finds themselves speeding through the railroaded "page turning option" that they have to simply see what pornography is next.
When the main story is finished I would love it if the game designer went back and started creating branching story pathways from the obvious key moments of choice (e.g. medical test one, medical test two, family discovery one, family discovery two, friend discovery one, friend discovery two, etc... they are very obvious and look ready to go) to greatly enhance the game elements and choose-your-own adventure aspect of this HTML game.
Right now I can only cautiously recommend this as a story to read and not a game to play, with some pornography thrown in to keep you amused. But if you're seeking a game here this current release is not it.
I hope for so much more with this game. So as Blauz. has pointed out to me in the past, I'll head to the discussion thread for this game next following this review.
The main attraction to many now is the porn pictures and gif.
In this context the story itself is pale and mostly does not come through. (the thing above oversadows it)
Color codeing is sometimes a mess the conversation is hard to folow. Suggestion: list the person with its color on the left.
Really enjoyed this, but the font colours are honestly a mess. Sometimes the wrong colour is used for someone in a scene, and sometimes the colours just seem to change out of nowhere. Makes it really difficult to follow who is speaking.
I've really enjoyed playing through your game. More please!
I like this game a lot. I wish you'd add some big note when you are at the end of current content though. And I guess I wish there were more choices one could make. But the quality is good of the writing and the game overall.
I like it.
Like most games/novels on this site it doesn't have much content, but it's an item of interest for sure.
Good job so far. I would suggest you follow the suggestions offered by the previous reviewers. Every action the MC take should have multiple options which can lead down different paths, like finding his sister's underwear and trying them on, this should either lead to him liking the undies, not liking that particular pair, or wanting to try different styles and material. Remember, female underwear comes in lace, satin, silk, cloth etc and the various styles should make him curious so that he experiments until he finds the ones that he likes. Also, he should buy his own at some point instead of running the risk of getting caught by his sister.
Incidentally, my game cut off after the MC went out for drinks after sister picked him up from work. Was that supposed to happen?
I can't say if I like the game, coz I got locked at the moment when his sister ask him for filling in her at her work. I couldn't find a link to continue the history (I'd thank help about it). Until then, I found the game too lineal, but with potential.
Story is good. I agree with the other posts on how to improve it.
I like to add. Name game something other than new. Have a descriptive title.
Have the title in the bordef of the games.
Also include an about or help button on the left side so you can put the release date, version, contact information and so forth in it.
As you make new versions you may want to list the changes in an another button on the left side.
Having a description your the MC at least and other important characters is very help along with the game objective.
If you turn this into a game then having a list of open quests and information about them would be good. Also list the number of closed quests. You could summarize what you found or important information obtained from that quest.
As a first attempt you did very well.
There is a lot of potential here. Of course, as you acknowledge, it's not much of a game - more like a visual novel. However, you could turn it into a game by adding some choices and consequences at various points. For example, if you chose not to play with Emily's boyfriend, you could have an encounter with someone else. The job/risk/debt dynamic of Perverted Education (also on this site) might be a good model.
You write well. Two comments on dialog: Use the same dialog color for each character throughout the story. Also, when a new person talks, start them on a new line, so each comment stands alone. It will make the text look MUCH less dense.
For starters, this is pretty damn good as a first-time thing; there are some grammatical errors and missing words in sentences, but they can be overlooked if you're not a grammar nazi. The story itself is pretty good so far as well, Emily really feels like a genuine sister; she's willing to help but also teases and embarrasses you. Also on a little side note, I like that it takes place in the Netherlands, since I'm a Dutchie, too. I look forward to seeing more of this and if you want to give it more style, I really do suggest that you fix the grammatical errors, although it's not needed to understand what's going on. Keep on writing, you've certainly got potential.