The writing is some of the worst I've ever seen, there are tons of typos, repeated world building, every character using the same terms, the moaning just being "ahhhhhhhhhhhh" repeatedly, just copy pasted it for about 15 times per sex scene, the sex scenes themselves being entirely copy pasted, having the kids introduced as 18, but referring to them later as 15 and 13, and characters referring to themselves with their own names most of the time, but mixed up with he/she/I at other times.
I also recommend to only make the POV/MC/protagonist a single person, we don't need to have every single character be the MC/protagonist, that's just confusing and annoying, which is only made worse with your horrible writing.
When Oliver and Tracy are supposed to wear the other's night clothes, the characters are still wearing their own, nothing on Daniel suggests he's wearing a big bra either.
All in all, this is a zero effort project only meant to make some money on Patreon, take a look at some great 3d renders visual novels on F95Zone, maybe you'll learn something and actually want to put some effort into both the writing and the visuals.
It seems jarring for multiple characters to use the exact same phrases to describe events. "the camel's back"
The narrator should have somethng to say other than "Riverside - where the bad kids go" and it's not necessary for the narrator to say so every time the school is mentioned.
Most people think of themselves as "I", not he or she or their own proper name. Most people think of familiar people as he/she and lesser known folks as Mr./Mrs./Miss <surname>. For example, mom would think of the principle by his first name as they are co-workers or by his title when their relative ranks matter, but others in the family would only know him as Mr., or Principal, <surname>.
Static shots of a building exterior, perhaps with a label, are an easy way to show a scene change and explain why there's a new sprite on screen with the cast.
So far, the game concept seems to be leading toward an interesting series of events and I encourage you to keep on, but the writing isn't keeping up with the art or story. That's where you'll want to focus your efforts.
XXX game with a 13 year old character as one of the main cast? That's a no from me dawg. I'd love to actually give the game a try once that changes to see the story and gameplay, but until then I'm not even going to give it a download. Sorry
The ages of the child characters gets a big yikes from me. Might want to change that my guy. (There is at least one scene where a purportedly 13 y/o girl undresses and nothing is obscured). Scrubbed my hard drive, hard pass on this one until things are changed.